Well, this is my last (hopefully) bar prep countdown blog. I kinda missed my usual Sunday update, but figured that getting to sleep early was more important. This last week was my final push to the Texas Bar Exam and I doubled my study time. From last Sunday to yesterday I logged in 81.5 hours.
At 8 pm yesterday my study partner and I closed our books and said, “No mas.” While we’ll for sure do some light review of our condensed notes the rest of this week, the intense and focused study time is done. Thank you, God.
As we left the SMU Law Library that had been our home for the last 9 days, it was sort of bittersweet. We’d developed our little routine, for the most part we got there at the same time everyday (after a visit to Starbuck’s ), we left there at the same time everyday, we sat at the same table and saw the same 5 or 6 people and we studied like probably neither of us has ever studied before. I have come to realize that studying for the bar exam is unlike any other kind of studying I’ve ever done. Ever. And it’s because no matter how much you study or how long you study, there’s always more to learn.
I thought of it this way: The “LAW” is as vast and deep as the ocean. However, what law you need to know for the bar exam is only the surface of the ocean, maybe 6″ deep. But how many of us, if challenged,would have more success putting 6″ worth of all the world’s oceans in our pocket as opposed to ALL of the world’s oceans? The reality is, both tasks are just as daunting. You do what you can do and then you move on.
I started out this summer with a goal and that was to eat the elephant one bite at a time and I accomplished that. Now, I’m a day away from my bar exam and no matter what happens, I know I did all I could do. I tracked my progress. I had a plan for every day. I sacrificed time, and sleep, and LIFE, for the opportunity to tackle the biggest, most important test of my life and to do it well.
No matter what happens the rest of this week and when results are released, I have no regrets and no reason to second-guess myself. I can honestly look at myself in the mirror and know that I gave myself the best shot at doing this right the first time.
I am blessed to have so many friends and family and colleagues that genuinely supported me through this experience. Thank you to my wonderful study partner, E.J., here in Dallas who was a pleasure to be around during this most stressful time. Thanks for keeping us on a tight schedule and taking care of parking for us which made it so convenient. I appreciate studying with someone who was as serious and diligent as I was (and sometimes more so!). I also enjoyed the precious few breaks we took to walk around and just laugh off some of the stress. I am so going to miss seeing you! I know you are going to do great on the bar; that’s just the kind of person you are. I’m glad you’re my friend.
Thanks also to my friend, L.H. with whom I’ve stayed for 4 years of law school and now up until the bar. You have been wonderful. These last two weeks I’ve been here you’ve taken care to be sure I had dinner every night and provided a calming environment where I could study undisturbed. But too, you were there to remind me to take a break and have some ice cream: The bar exam is just a test. I appreciate the perspective, sometimes it was hard to remember that.
Well, after over 495 study hours, 20 or so practice essays, a dozen MPTs and over 700 practice problems all I can say is let the chips fall where they may this week. If the Texas Bar Exam eats my lunch, it will be a long hard-fought battle, because I’m not going to make it easy.
I’m bringing everything I have and everything I’ve learned and every prayer I’ve sent heavenward throughout this journey. And I’ve got any army of people praying for me this week and so I know, nothing is impossible.
“..being confident of this, that HE who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Phil 1:6″
This week, I’m claiming this promise.